In Search of Sunrise

So, I haven’t updated in a long long while…

Since the last time I updated a lot things have happened. Firstly, I guess I should say that I went to Thailand this past week. Thailand was a bit overwhelming for me. I mean China was polluted and the people were trying to rip me off at every turn, but it was in a much more controlled environment. In Thailand, I felt like the pollution seeping into my skin, and the constant nagging of vendors and people trying to get at your wallet was simply mind-numbing at points. However, there were some really good times in Thailand, too.

The first day I spent there with Gwenniferd was a bit hectic. We crammed a lot of cultural sites into one day — and we did so on foot. We saw the Temple of the Emerald Buddha, the Grand Palace, the Temple of the Reclining Buddha, Wat Arun, and the biggest Buddhist monument in the world. Of course, I have pictures to prove it, but one thing at a time. We also visited a couple of malls, and shamefully took in a movie… TRANSFORMERS! Oh yeah, baby. But seriously, I remember Transformers. It’s too bad Starscream didn’t get a lot of screen time, but he still pwns all. I was so happy to see that many of the original voice actors lent their voices to the series one final time. It was at the mall that Gwenniferd and I were able to get some knock off LeSportSac bags; normally around 100 bucks a pop or more, these bags were cheap - about 5 bucks or so. It’s just the designs that we like, not the name, so who really cares?

Of course, I ate some Thai food, which was quite tasty, but three of my feeding times consisted of Pizza Hut. I’m sorry, I know, but I’ve gone a year in Japan without Pizza. Yes, they’re pizza in Japan, but it’s Japanese pizza. There are many things that the Japanese can do and can do better, but pizza is NOT one of them.

One other note of depressing interest, we saw some nasty, fugly old white dudes crawling around with some young Thai girls (or boys). Totally pathetic, disgusting, and long list of other words. No need to say what was going on there.

Anyway, as far as Thailand goes, I’ll let the pictures say the rest.

When I returned from the trip, however, I to take a test… a driving test. Just thinking about the hell of the menkyo center brings back so many unpleasant memories despite my current sublime mood… But I might as well talk about this experience as well. I HATE THAT PLACE. But really my feelings for the licensing center cannot really be summed up by those mere four words alone. The people there are racist and sexist and just about every other negative word you can think of. I never thought my every action was judged, scrutinized, and graded more than when I was at that place. In Japan, licenses are issued by the police department, so it’s like the DMV, but worse. Instead of anal paper pushers, we get anal asinine cops, Japanese cops, which are famous for many things, but being helpful is not one of them.

So, the first day I took the test, I did nothing wrong, but I still didn’t pass. I drove perfectly. I had people watching me from the viewing point who even informed me of my excellent driving, but no, I failed. I successfully completed ALL of the difficult portions of the test. I obsessively looked at my mirrors, over my shoulders, and right and left; I rolled down my windows, looked for an imaginary train, listened for an imaginary train; I didn’t run over a single curb (automatic fail by the way), made all the hard left turns, made all the hard right turns; cleared the yellow poles on the tight 90-degree angled road (another automatic fail), cleared all road hazards; and exited the vehicle properly, looking both ways before getting out.

So, what did I do wrong? I drove “too slowly” of course!

Additionally, while the tester commended my paranoid mirror-checking and right-left checking, when I stopped at an intersection to look both ways across the crosswalk and both ways at the “traffic” on my right and left side, I needed to look AGAIN as I was passing through the intersection!

Let me say though that this test occurs on a course. It’s difficult to know when to look for imaginary people that I can’t see, or for traffic that just isn’t there. I can only play “pretend” so much. It’s a ridiculous test. In fact, it’s not so much a test of your skill, but rather a litmus test of the tester’s mood. If the proctor is PMS’ing that day, any and all foreigners are totally screwed. Foreigners in the city don’t have it so bad, but I live in Podunk, Japan. The traffic center is almost four hours away!

However, I only had to take the test twice, which is actually pretty good for a foreigner, especially since I am female. Most of the time, women must take the test at least three times before they are allowed to receive a license. But I am still required to get a “beginner’s sticker” for my car. It’s this ugly looking yellow monstrosity that brands me as “the dangerous foreigner who somehow managed to squirrel a license away from menkyo center - Japanese citizens be wary!”

The experience was more serious and aggravating than I can properly articulate, mostly because it is over and I am so very relieved that I never have to go back that hell hole. But believe me, as I heard one Japanese lady tell the proctor, “It’s no wonder you people (the people at the menkyo center) have such a bad reputation among foreigners!”

Indeed, I’d like to see them try to get a license in a foreign language in America, but then again, we give licenses to anyone…

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